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Kinja'd!!! "TurboSloth" (TheTurboSloth)
05/25/2014 at 00:08 • Filed to: None

Kinja'd!!!0 Kinja'd!!! 12

NO MORE EVO? NO CTSV WAGON? NO MORE SLS AMG?NO MORE E-SERIES RAPE VANS?

I really wanted these cars* in the future. Sure I can buy them used, but I'm willing to bet that these cars will go for alot more now that supply is going to be low.

*No, I don't want a Ford E-Series Rape Van. I am not, never have, and never will own a rape van. No, I am not a rapist, nor have I been affiliated with any. plz dont send Chris Hansen :(


DISCUSSION (12)


Kinja'd!!! PatBateman > TurboSloth
05/25/2014 at 00:10

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The gentlemen doth protest too much, methinks.


Kinja'd!!! CRider > TurboSloth
05/25/2014 at 00:10

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Don't worry, you can still rape people in the new Transit. Actually, with the new tall Transit, you can stack up bodies even higher! Not to mention with the new fuel efficient EcoBoost engines, fewer fuel stops means less chances for escape!


Kinja'd!!! Freakusaurus > TurboSloth
05/25/2014 at 00:25

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I oddly do want a rape van. . . . Faced with the possibility of being homeless, the Rape Van would be wonderful.. I can set the back up to be a small room.. and atleast I can sleep in it cause I sure can't sleep in my convertible E46. . . . .

If it is any color other than white, is it still a rape van ? I mean if it is royal blue maybe it is less rapey I think. The A-Team and Mystery Inc. weren't rapest... . .


Kinja'd!!! CRider > Freakusaurus
05/25/2014 at 00:29

Kinja'd!!!1

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Kinja'd!!! TurboSloth > Freakusaurus
05/25/2014 at 00:45

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A-Team livery would be instacool.


Kinja'd!!! Squid > TurboSloth
05/25/2014 at 00:49

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Dude, rape vans are fun. You can just park anywhere and camp out in the van. You can add a mattress and insulate the back so it won't get too hot or cold. Plus they come with a lifetime supply of free candy. And they run forever when maintained. They are basically F-series trucks with a van body so you can haul and tow stuff with ease.

I'm just bummed we never got the CT9-A Evo wagon over here.


Kinja'd!!! AMGtech - now with more recalls! > CRider
05/25/2014 at 01:12

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I was thinking of this exact picture.


Kinja'd!!! AMGtech - now with more recalls! > TurboSloth
05/25/2014 at 01:14

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It is. There was one at SEMA a few years ago.


Kinja'd!!! Freakusaurus > CRider
05/25/2014 at 01:21

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I guess in other colors they still are rape vans. . . . . damn. . .


Kinja'd!!! pdthedeuce > TurboSloth
05/25/2014 at 03:17

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...not a rapist ? this pic says otherwise ...

Kinja'd!!!


Kinja'd!!! Manuél Ferrari > CRider
05/25/2014 at 04:02

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So funny


Kinja'd!!! CPT Speedbump > TurboSloth
05/25/2014 at 12:17

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Maybe this will help you feel better - the older Evo's are better anyway, and the SLS AMG has no manual option.